Day #7: Back after a 2-day break

I know I shouldn't have taken a little break from this challenge, but I had a good excuse - the hurricane, or rather post-tropical cyclone (?) Sandy.

So today was one of those.."meh" days....We woke up late, and I started to have some juice and then my fiance decided he wanted to go out for lunch, so we ended up at Friendly's. I did my best to pick the lowest-calories option, but the chain is known for fatty food and ice cream, so considering that fact, I did pretty well. (Note: I know they have a "low-calorie" menu, but none of it appealed to me today). I also didn't get ice cream (not that I wasn't tempted), and I'm pretty proud of myself for that!

Also, because a base was stolen in the world series, Taco Bell was giving out free locos tacos. My fiance wanted to go, but then he didn't want to eat both of the tacos, so I just ate mine. I'm pretty surprised at the calorie count, but then again, it didn't have sour cream on it (which is the usual calorie bomb).

So, before I get to the food diary, I just want to say that this morning I posted a weigh-in. I usually weigh myself every Monday, but because it was dark yesterday I couldn't, so I just did it today. :) (Psst...I lose 4 pounds!) I think I mostly was losing bloating and water weight, which is usually the result of a bad diet, so when I started eating healthier that bloat was the first thing to go.

Breakfast: 240
Minute Maid - Ruby Red Grapefruit Juice 15.2 oz, 15.2 oz (450ml) - 240

Lunch: 706
Friendly's - Super Tuna Melt, 1/2 sandwich - 380
Friendly's - Clam Chowder, 1 cup - 270
Nabisco Premium Crackers - Hint of Salt - Saltine Crackers, 4 crackers - 56

Dinner: 685
4 Seviroli Stuffed Shells (baked) - 420
1 cup of Del Grosso's tomato basil pasta sauce - 160
1 cup of frozen sweet peas, boiled - 105

Snacks/Drinks: 350
Tea - 0 Water - 0 1 mozzarella cheese stick - 80
1 serving (24 sticks) of Pretzel Sticks - 100
1 Doritos Locos Taco from Taco Bell - 170


Exercise:
None.

TOTAL: 1981

Now to leave you with some motivation before I call it a night... (note: I do not own, nor did I create this photo. I honestly don't remember where it came from, I just had it saved on my computer. If you are the owner of this photo please comment or email me to have it removed or to get credit. Thanks for your understanding, I don't want to infringe on any copyright or ownership or whatever!)

I thought it was fitting, considering the stormy weather that has been and will continue to plague the east coast the next few days.

Weigh-in for the week of Monday October 29

Previous Weight: 241 pounds.
Current Weight: 237 pounds
Mini-goal #1: 229
Big goal #1: 200
Pounds Lost: 4

Day #6: Busy Busy Busy

I'm going to keep this post short and simple. I was busy. I didn't eat as well as I should of. Calorie-count-wise I did OK, but health-wise I did horrible.

Breakfast: 100

1 serving (24 sticks) of Pretzel Sticks - 100

Lunch: 390

1 McDonalds McDouble no pickles - 390

Dinner: 340

1 slices of L.O.L. white american cheese - 160

3 slices of Oscar Meyer cooked ham - 90

2 slices of Sara Lee 45 calories & delightful wheat bread - 90

Snacks/Drinks: 400

Water - 0
1 mozzarella cheese stick - 80

1 cup of Dip N Dots Banana Split ice cream - 

Exercise: 

I wish I could count running around like crazy doing errands and prepping for a hurricane...but I can't. LOL.

TOTAL: 1230

P.S. - The building where I live loses power alot. Even on cloudless, rainless days. So, in anticipation of the hurricane, please note that if I don't post it is because I lost power. Stay safe everyone!

Day #5: Going out to eat for the first time while on my new path

So, I met with a great friend today to hang out and catch up. The most obvious place to meet up is at a restaurant for food and drinks. I was in a panic before I went. Going out to eat almost always derails my progress for the day. I know that about myself. Worse still, we're going to Damon's a bar/grill/BBQ type place which isn't exactly know for its healthy options. Before I met up with her, I went online to look at their menu and calorie counts. Let's just say I was very frightened at how unhealthy they could make a salad or chicken! LOL That is why, after I ordered and ate, I was a little surprised at how many calories my salad was listed as having. I take that number with a grain of salt....it doesn't seem accurate. Also, Damon's has a little "healthy eating" box in the middle of it's menu...it all looked like crap. So, be weary of food places try to sell as "healthy."

See my diary after the jump! :)

Day #4: Mistakes were made, but everyone starts somewhere

Cream cheese is another one of those food like ketchup for me, It's so yummy! I could eat it straight off the brick...and most likely eat the whole brick. Haha. It was hard for me to control my intake of cream cheese, and the only reason I even had cream cheese in my apartment is because last week when I was binging on food, I bought it with the intention to eat the whole thing. While I'm glad I didn't, the taste was just so yummy that after I was done with my bagel thin, I wanted more cream cheese! The craving lasted all the way until lunch, and then it was gone. I'm glad I toughed it out.

However, there are two other things I ate today that I'm not proud of. First (under snacks) I ate a Dunkin Donuts vanilla creme doughnut with icing. I was strong and wasn't going to have one of the dozen that were given to my cousin in the hospital. But she really wanted me to have one and eat it in front of her, and I just can't say no to a sick child (could you?). But, I have no excuse for the McDouble from McDonalds. It was 11:30 at night, I was driving, I thought I was hungry, but looking back I think I was just tired. :( Mistakes were made today, but thats OK, I just have to do better tomorrow.

My diary for today:

Breakfast: 310

1 Thomas 100% Whole Wheat Bagel Thin - 110

1 oz (1/3 of the smallest brick they sell, which is like 2 inches by 3 inches) of Philadelphia Cream Cheese - 100

1/2 cup of large curd cottage cheese - 100

Lunch: 370

3 slices of Oscar Meyer Cooked Ham - 90

1 slice of Land O' Lakes white american cheese - 80

1 teaspoon of French's Original Yellow Mustard - 0

2 slices of Sara Lee 45 calories & delightful wheat bread - 90

1 cup of green seedless grapes - 110

Dinner: 610

1 can (2 servings) of Healthy Choice Chicken and Rice soup - 220

1 McDonalds McDouble with no pickles - 390 

Snacks/Drinks: 765

Tea - 0
Water - 0
1 mozzarella cheese stick - 80

2 serving (24 sticks each serving) of Pretzel Sticks - 200

1 banana - 105

1 Dunkin Donuts Vanilla Creme Doughnut with icing - 380

Exercise: 

None. :\

TOTAL: 2055

I guess the total isn't that bad, considering MyFitnessPal has determined my daily intake should be 2090 calories. I still made It under the threshold, but I really want to try to keep it under 2000 everyday, especially since I'm not getting any exercise as of right now.

And for some final motivation. (note: I do not own, nor did I create this photo. I honestly don't remember where it came from, I just had it saved on my computer. If you are the owner of this photo please comment or email me to have it removed or to get credit. Thanks for your understanding, I don't want to infringe on any copyright or ownership or whatever!)

Day #3: "the difference between who you are & what you want to be is what you do"

I am feeling MUCH better today! :)

So, some of my thoughts on today... First, ketchup and me go together like salt and pepper. I LOVE ketchup! In the past I've put ketchup on literally everything. So, as most of you know, unlike plain yellow mustard (which is calorie free), ketchup has calories that can really add up if you're not keeping track. So today, when I was going to have ketchup with lunch, it was really annoying to both measure the ketchup and limit myself to what is considered 1 serving (1 tablespoon). It will take getting used to, but I really need to get in control of portions and servings. I cannot let my love for ketchup run amuck. LOL I have been trying recently to use mustard more, but as anyone who has eaten both ketchup and mustard know its waaaay different in taste! Oh well, baby steps. At least I'm trying.

Second, I am so happy it's wednesday! My week is almost over! I really wanted to go for a walk today, but I was so busy with work and schoolwork that I just wanted to get those things over with so that I could have more free time on the weekend. Again, I didn't exercise, but I plan to go for a walk tomorrow for sure! I can't make excuses, but I really need to force myself to walk, no matter what.

Third, I work up late and really munched on breakfast my entire morning, which is why didn't have a lunch listed in my food diary. Skipping meals is bad, but I didn't really skip it. So, I just need to wake up earlier tomorrow. LOL

Overall, I was pretty happy with my day.

Without further ado...

Breakfast: 420

1 cup great value large curd cottage cheese - 200

2 hard boiled eggs - 140

1 red apple - 80

sprinkle of cinnamon (spices don't have calories by the way) - 0

Lunch: 

(I didn't skip lunch, i woke up late, so I had breakfast (spread out) and then dinner and snacks)

Dinner: 412

1 Hatfield hamsteak (2.5 servings per steak) - 225
2 corn on the cobs - 167
1 tablespoon of Heinz ketchup - 20

Snacks/Drinks: 365

Tea - 0
Water - 0
2 mozzarella cheese sticks - 80

1 serving (24 sticks) of Pretzel Sticks - 100

1 banana - 105

Exercise: 

None. :\

TOTAL: 1197

And finally, here's some final motivation. :) (note: I do not own, nor did I create this photo. I honestly don't remember where it came from, I just had it saved on my computer. If you are the owner of this photo please comment or email me to have it removed or to get credit. Thanks for your understanding, I don't want to infringe on any copyright or ownership or whatever!)

Day # 2: Inspiration Jars

So, as I said in my last post, I was working on the jars from this cool project. :) It kept me busy for a little under half an hour, but then again, I did not spend that much time on them. I had the jars already (I save all glass jars because buying storage containers is idiotic to me), and I used duct tape and sharpie, since I didn't have any paint or modpodge or anything like that lying around. I didn't want to go out any buy anything, since money is tight. So I just used what I had. For the insides (the things you'd move), I used Kashi Cinnamon Harvest cereal pieces. The next time I visit my mom, I might borrow some marbles and change them out for the cereal. Haha. If you do make them, I'd love to see pictures! So post them in the comments, or email them to me and I can post them in one of my posts. :)

After the jump, see the pictures of my jars, and the rest of my post. :)

30 Day "Kickstart" Challenge - Day #1: Back at the Beginning

So, as part of the new JAW, I've decided to start with a bit of a challenge for myself, and if you have a blog or food diary (and you should!) you should try to join me!

I am going to make a post at the end of every day, for 30 days, to get myself back on track.

Here is how I am setting this up:

(Blurb about my day: a way for me to vent/talk about my daily frustrations and how I feel about myself. This part is especially important for emotional eaters!)

(Food diary: I will be getting some help from the MyFitnessPal app on my smartphone, which is app-solutly amazing! [Sorry, couldn't help the pun.] I will track my calorie intake and food, so you guys can get an idea of what I'm eating, and that I can hold myself accountable. haha.)

(Exercise: what (if anything) did I do that day to get moving.)

(And maybe occasionally, I will treat you guys with a picture or quote or something cool like that.)

After the jump, see my first entry! :) 

My First New Weigh-In!

So as with all new paths and start-overs, we all have to start at the very beginning again. I've actually gained weight over my previous start weight from before! My old start weight was 229. So, I decided that I would make 229 my first mini-goal!

Previous Weight: 241 pounds.
Current Weight: 241 pounds
Mini-goal #1: 229
Big goal #1: 200
Pounds Lost: 0

I'm just taking a deep breath, and starting over, with more life lessons under my belt, and more support than before. This time I will not only lose the weight, I will never fricking find those pounds again! LOL.

Starting Over....

Dear Readers,

Like many of you who have tried to lose weight over and over again, I have failed. I have failed to lose the weight I intended. I have failed to keep the weight I lost off. I have failed to stay on the path of healthy eating and exercise. I have failed you. I have failed my friends and my loved ones. But most of all, I have failed myself.

For those of you I have failed, and especially myself, I am sorry.

A wise man (I think it was Henry Ford) once said: "The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing."

So rather dwell on the fact I screwed up, I'd rather move on towards the future, a fresh start, a new beginning, on a new path.

This is me, making a promise to myself, with all of you as my witnesses: I will lose the weight, and I will become a healthy, fit, and happy person.

This new chapter in my life, and the life of Just Another Whale, will have some old and new stuff in it.

JAW will still have weekly weigh-ins and tips to help you guys out. But I am planning some cool new additions, which you'll have to wait and see!

As for myself, I plan on first and foremost, trying to control my emotional eating. I've pinpointed that as my worst eating habit. I know that will not be easy. I am dealing with a lot of stuff right now.

Setting aside the normal stress from working two jobs, being a full time grad student, and learning to live with my fiance, I am struggling to cope with the sickness of my little cousin, Audrianna. Saying this is very important for me because she inspires me everyday. She is 6 years old and has been battling Neuroblastoma (a rare childhood cancer) since she was 2 years old. She has had her ups and downs, and was even cancer-free for a few months, but her most recent relapse has been extremely aggressive. With chemo not having any effect, and there being no further treatment options, her mother made the painful, horrible, merciful decision to stop treatments, and take her back home to be with loved ones, out doing fun things, instead of suffering in the hospital getting treatment that has no effect. No child should know what chemo is like. No child should have a bucket list. But Audrianna does. I love her so much, and the thought of her suffering just makes me so sick to my stomach. I am extremely emotional right now, as anyone would be when a child is sick, but I am just so depressed and miserable about the entire situation. I haven't slept well since I found out she has no more treatment options. The insomnia doesn't help with my poor eating. Which leads me to watch TV, which leads to more binge eating.

I will just be sitting on the couch, watching TV, and the most random things will set me off. Like, last night, I was watching a show, and one of the clips was about a wedding. And, my emotions went crazy. I am planning a wedding for within the next two years, and I had been planning on two adorable flower girls. And I worry that I might only have one flower girl because the other is too sick (or god forbid, isn't with us anymore). And then, from out of left field, I start thinking about my dad. I don't have a father to walk me down the aisle because I lost him to cancer 12 years ago (it will be 13 in January). My emotions just snowballed and I ended up eating an entire tub of sour cream, two king size bars of Reese's chocolate, three cans of soda, a block of sour cream, a bag of Lindt truffles, and 9 Celeste personal pizzas. I calculated on my phone after I had cooled down, and I had eaten a little over 5,000 calories in the span of less than an hour. I felt disgusted with myself.

I need to regain control of my emotional eating, and that is my first challenge on this new path.

I want to be healthy, and live a lifestyle that decreases my chances of getting sick. I want to be strong and healthy, so that if I do ever get sick, that I can fight.

So, if I slip and fall or stumble along this new path I'm trying to take, please forgive me. I will do my best to forgive myself for it, so I can move on and not dwell on it (like I usually would...usually involving cheesecake filling).

Hopefully you guys will support me, as I will try to support you.

Enjoy the new Just Another Whale!

~MyzzLyzz

P.S.- If anyone wants to donate money for Audrianna, or help with her bucket list, please see the following pages! Every little bit counts, even just kind words and prayers.

Click here for the link to her moms' blogspot, where you can donate and read more.  

Click here for the link to her bucket list group on Facebook.

Click here for the link to her Facebook group.

Click here for the link to her mom's Facebook, where you can contact her to buy various things to support her, or just show your love and support.